Mr. Lu Xun created the tragic image of Sister Xianglin in his short story Blessing. Sister Xianglin's husband died and her son was eaten by wolves, and she told people about her misfortune. At first, she was able to be comforted by others, and made them shed a few tears of sympathy. However, her repeated misfortunes would bring pressure on others, virtually causing "audience" uneasiness, or a burden. People would not like to comfort her repeatedly, but if they wanted to get rid of this complex emotion, they could only stay away from her, or even laugh at her.

When people reach middle age, their parents are getting older, their bodies are getting worse and worse, and their children are still young. At this time, they have more pressure on their shoulders. Some people begin to complain and complain to others in order to get sympathy and comfort from others and find an outlet for their pressure.

However, there are many disadvantages in complaining to others.

1.Complaining makes one depressed, lose confidence and even despair.
Filled with resentment and injustice, people will complain and complain to others constantly. As time goes by, they will become depressed, lose confidence and even become desperate. Moreover, complaining is not conducive to a person's physical and mental health, which often makes people exhausted.

2.Complaining will eventually bring pain to others, which is boring.

When the complainer finds the listener, he will pour the bitter water in his belly to the other party, which will also bring pressure and anxiety to the listener. Gradually, they choose to escape and do not want to be a dustbin.

3.Complaining is tantamount to letting others grasp the handle of hurting you.
You tell others all your misfortunes. If he is a kind person, he will bury your pain in his heart and share it with his family at most. But if you meet a person with ulterior motives, your complaint will let others grasp the handle of hurting you, and they always has a way of embroidering, at least making you become the topic of conversation and laughter.

4.Your complaint eventually becomes the reference and placebo for others to relieve their pain.

One was unhappy when he lost a shoe, until one day he saw a man lose a leg. A man was unhappy when he lost one leg, until one day he saw that someone had lost two legs. The man who lost two legs was also unhappy until he saw someone leave the world one day.

Is it better to see others suffering more than yourself? When you tell others about your misfortunes, your misfortunes will become the reference and placebo for others to ease their pain, and they will always be used for comparison.

When people reach middle age, the burden on their shoulders becomes heavier and heavier, and the inner depression accumulates more and more, but there is no place to talk about it. In fact, they can't talk about it to others.

It is a man who buries his sadness in his heart and gives his pain to the wind. He understands his own bitterness, because a man knows that chattering and complaining to others can only cause others to disgust, disregard and ridicule you.

鲁迅先生在其短篇小说《祝福》中塑造了祥林嫂这个悲剧形象，祥林嫂的丈夫死去了，儿子被狼吃掉了，祥林嫂向人诉说着不幸。最初，还能得到别人的安慰，甚至也能博得几滴同情的泪水，可是她反复述说的不幸是会给别人带来压力的，无形中造成“听众”的不安，或者说一种负担，人们不愿同样反复的安慰，而想要摆脱这种复杂的情绪，就只能离她远远的，甚至是嘲笑她。

人到中年，自己的老人渐渐老去，自己的身体每况愈下，自己的孩子还未成年，这时的压力最大。有的人便开始抱怨，向别人诉苦，以期能够得到别人的同情和安慰，为自己的压力找到释放的出口。

可殊不知，向别人诉苦有着诸多的不利。

一、诉苦使自己变得消沉，丧失信心甚至变得绝望。

心中充满着怨恨和不平，才会不停地向别人抱怨、诉苦，久而久之，就会使自己变得消沉，失去信心甚至最终变得绝望，而且诉苦也不利于一个人身心的健康，往往使人心力交瘁。

二、诉苦最终会给别人带来痛苦，令人生厌。

诉苦的人找到倾听者，就会把满肚子里的苦水倾倒给对方，也会给倾听者带来压力和不安，渐渐地他们就选择了逃避，不愿再充当垃圾桶。

三、诉苦等于是让别人抓住了伤害你的把柄。

你把一切的不幸都告诉了别人，若是善良的人他会把你的痛苦埋在心底，最多和自家人分享；可若是你遇到了一个别有用心的人，那你的诉苦便让别人抓住了伤害你的把柄，甚至是添油加醋，至少也成了他人茶余饭后谈笑的话题。

四、你的诉苦最终成为了别人减轻痛苦的参照物和安慰剂。

有一个丢了一只鞋闷闷不乐，直到有一天看到有个人丢了一条腿；有个人丢了一条腿闷闷不乐，直到有一天看到有人丢了两条腿；丢了两条腿的这个人同样闷闷不乐，直到有一天目睹有人离开这个世界。

看到别人比自己更为痛苦，是不是内心就好受了一些？你向别人诉说自己的不幸，你的这些不幸便成了别人减轻痛苦的参照物和安慰剂，时时被别人拿来进行比对。

人到中年，肩上的担子越来越沉重，内心的苦闷越积越多，却又无处倾诉，实则也不能向人诉说。

把忧伤埋在心底，把痛苦交给风，自己的苦自己懂，这才是一个男人的样子，因为一个男人懂得，喋喋不休，向人诉苦，最终只能招来别人的厌恶、唾弃和嘲弄。

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