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You never know how strong you are until you are faced with a difficult situation that needs you to make an important decision or choice that will either make your life or destroy your life and it was during this period that I realized how strong I was and that I could be and could do anything I wish to do or wish to be as long as I set my mind or determine to do it.
I don't think there is anyone who has not gone through a rough patch at a certain point in their life, it could be financially, emotionally, physically, spiritually, or psychologically but the truth is no one can have his or her cake and have it all, well not in this world.
One way or the other, we all may face different challenges of different magnitude and why most people grow into a strong personality because over time, they've learned to see beyond their challenges and see possibility amidst the impossibility, others sink into it and end up wasted and broken beyond repair.
My downfall started after the death of my father, as a first child, I realized that I've got many responsibilities and got to live up to my expectations although at a young age but then, I had to step up and do something so my family especially my younger siblings don't feel the gap of our father.
And during that period, I made a lot of mistakes, stepped on many toes, and did a few things that I shouldn't have done, although still regret them but I am also grateful that I grew passed them.
There are many hardships I have gone through after my father passed away but I will be giving detail of one I rarely talk about because it left a scar in my heart even until this day.
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Like I told us, my dad passed away at my tender age, and I was still in my Senior Year one a few days to resume my Senior Year two, so we all had to return to our hometown for the burial and after the burial, my maternal parents insisted that my mom stays back with us instead of returning since we had nobody over there.
So, I was sent to leave with my uncle and his wife who enrolled me into a public school so I could finish my senior year, I was eager to finish my senior year so I can get a job and help my mom send my younger ones to school and yeah, I achieved that plan but things got out of hand when a man 23 years younger than I came for my hand in marriage.
I was dumbfounded, how an elderly man could have the confidence to ask for the hand of a young seventeen-year-old teenage girl who just finished her senior school a few months ago in marriage.
Well, I had almost given in to the pressure of getting married to that man because out of love, I wanted to help my family. At that time, we were going through a lot and I guess he made so many promises to help my mom once he marries me even when I knew firstly I was too young to carry such a responsibility, secondly, I did not love him but a few words from my mom one evening broke the camels back and then and there, I knew being strong, having a choice of my own was the only option for me. I needed to take certain steps if I needed to get out of the mess.
One of the decisions was that I was that getting married because of family challenges and not because of love was never going to be an option.
I stood my ground, fought back, and left home for months even when many times my mom threatened me, I never let her words get to me because I didn't want such things to become history, legacy, hereditary, or whatever it was to continue in my family.
Although taking poison to kill myself was never a better option but it helped my mom realize what an asshole the man was and that we could leave a better life without her giving me away for marriage with the hope that things are going to be better and that she doesn't want me to end up living a wayward life or giving birth out of wedlock because of the challenges I was going through. I came out strong and today I am happy I had refused such marriage, that I never allowed life to push me into taking decisions I would have regretted now.
They say life happens and indeed life happens and we can not stop it from throwing at us the garbages but what we shouldn't allow happen to us is giving up on ourselves and letting these things sink us into the darkest part.
throws you up and around in different ways, There are many hardships I have gone through but one of them I can describe here.
Staying strong, standing true to your words, and having a mind of our own during the challenging times regardless of the words of people trying to swerve us from the truth and the pains we see ahead of us is very important.
Asking questions and having a listening ear to be able to listen to every word in detail and being able to perceive every unsaid word, action, and gesture can save not just a soul but generations.
Although gone through the worst situations, but I have refused and learned not to let these challenges define who I am or who I will be in the future, although they are part of the things that keep me pushing forward, but I refuse to look like my challenges.
I wouldn't say things are at their peak for me right now but all I can say is my resilience paid off well for me and it has made me stronger and better after all I have been through.
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