Some couples have different communication styles, such as talkers versus non-talkers, or people who deal with things via talking versus people who like to get on with things. Other couples used to communicate well but have stopped listening to each other; instead they try to fill in the blanks and mind-read. Sometimes every conversation becomes a battle.
All of these problems can be overcome if the couple is willing to identify what goes wrong and make some changes. You can even do this by yourself if your partner won’t talk to you about it. Ask yourself: “What happens when I want to talk about something important?” “When did I last try hard to really listen and understand my partner?”
Think through what you want to say first. Choose your time and place. Practice “talk time”, where you each have three minutes to say what you need to say uninterrupted and then your partner responds. Use email or write a letter if you have something important to say that you can’t find the words for. Try to use “I” statements and avoid blaming the other person; when people get defensive it’s hard to listen well.