I think I was 4 or 3 years old. I was outside with a round object in both my hands (it was a steering wheel but I didn't know what it was at the time). I remember I was running with it but then I stopped and that's when it hit me. I was alive. Suddenly I was seeing and feeling the everything for the first time.
The green grass, the tall tree lines. The old cars and trailer park, the colors of the fallen yellow and orange leaves on the ground and in the trees. The breeze and morning sunshine. The blue steering wheel in my hands.
I didn't know how I got here. I didn't know where I was or where to go. I was feeling hungry and scared. I dropped the steering wheel and walked some distance into the gravel driveway. I was confused and desperate. No signs of life just the trees and the grass and strange objects (cars, houses and stuff).
Then I heard a beautiful voice calling. I turned to look around but didn't know where to look then I heard the call again. And there she was. A tall woman standing in front of the door looking directly at me telling me to come in.
My feet just moved on their own and I was inside. I didn't greet or talk to the women. I was still frightened on what would happen. I felt like running away right there but it was too late. The door has been closed.
I looked all around with a wall behind me. I could see the kitchen and I was in the living room now. Dinner was being offered. I was skeptical still. I didn't know whether I could trust these people. But her sweet way of talking to me and her gentle way smoothed my fears away. She felt comforting to me and that was better than what I had going on outside in my shocked state of coming to be.
I didn't say anything to anyone. But then I started to cry because of what I had just gone through. I have came to be conscious for the first time. I existed now. It was a fact I couldn't ignore even then.
She came and picked me up. She didn't know what was wrong but I felt a little better being held by the sweet woman who came to be known as my mother.
Wow. Very few People remember when They became aware. I was quite a bit younger and it was not so traumatic... I have flashes of My parents encouraging Me to walk, but the first full memory was the day I did so, just past 1 year of age.
I describe it in this video I did:
Why I Am This Unspeakable Thing: (5 min): https://odysee.com/@amaterasusolar:8/why-i-am-this-unspeakable-thing-5:8
I wonder if there is significance to the fact that most of us do not remember the time from birth until several years in. Perhaps certain necessary brain structures have not developed far enough yet to allow for this.