Tell the Truth and Remember Less

It's been said that the one thing that an alcoholic will never do is tell the truth and remember less. That may be true and it may also be said that the one person who can tell the truth and remember less is you. Why not? When we are called upon to defend our actions, we are asked to do the same thing that an alcoholic would do when faced with the Internal Revenue Service. We are expected to be honest and tell the whole truth, but what about remembering?

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Is it possible that we actually need to remember less in order, to tell the truth and remember less? I believe so. Many times a person who is facing serious criminal charges or civil actions has a hard time remembering important details that might prove to be crucial in the outcome of those actions. In many cases, they don't really remember all that happened at any particular moment, even if they think they do.

Consider for a moment the aftermath of a car accident. There are both injuries and damage to property and a lot of people are understandably shaken. But what about all those driving around at the time? How many of them remember that there was a pileup on the freeway a few hours earlier? Probably none, and if so, why?

The reason is that most of us are too stressed, too worried, too emotional, too tired, etc. To 'remember' everything accurately, particularly to the minutest detail, takes a lot of effort. Then, the next day, we have to re recount everything that we had previously told to others and perhaps give ourselves some allowance for remembering things incorrectly. Most of us also tend to muddle through, trying to remember bits and pieces of the story, remembering only the important parts, which aren't necessarily the whole truth.

When it comes to matters of the heart, this tendency to muddle along has a much deeper problem. It is much easier, in most cases, to forget the truth and hide unpleasant truths from our loved ones. But hiding the truth from loved ones may not help anyone (on the other hand, telling the truth may help someone who has been injured and who feels sympathy for others), and may actually cause more damage than good.

This is one of the reasons that people, especially people in relationships, need to know how to tell the truth and remember less. If you are in a relationship and have an individual to share the truth with, this will be even more important. You have to let your partner or significant another know (in confidence, of course) that you have been overwhelmed and bothered by recent events, but that you want them to understand that you are okay and healing. Tell your partner exactly how and why you are feeling the way that you do. Don't hold back, and don't hesitate to let your partner see the pain that you have been experiencing.

When it comes to the person you love, and especially when you are in the middle of a relationship where things are constantly changing, honesty is always the best policy. You may have to wait a while before you can get honest with your significant other, but it's worth the wait. It's also a good idea to remind yourself that the person you love doesn't want to hear about all of the lies, cheating, and sadness that is part of your life. Sometimes, when you are in a relationship, we can't help but lie about certain things, so it's important to remember not to give your partner the ammunition to use against you when they do find out something that they didn't.

The truth is, sometimes forgetting the truth is the best way, to tell the truth, and remember less. Sometimes, keeping quiet just makes life easier for everyone involved. Remember that you and your partner need to concentrate on working through the issues and not causing more damage to the relationship. Being honest and trying to be supportive, can go a long way toward making your marriage and life easier and less stressful. In fact, remember that if you truly want to make things better, you need to start being honest with one another!