When I visited the States back then in the end of the 1990s and the beginning of the new millenia I had to do groceries.
As we often had parties or the typical drink at the end of a working day, our consumption of Bombay Saphire was quite remarkable, together with lime fruits and tonic water.
It is to be noted that I was asked several (irritatingly often) times for my ID, even though this was at the end of my twenties and beginning thirties. Note also, I never was asked once to show my ID in a supermarket, where I come from, the beautiful nation of Germany.
The cashiers obviously lacked the ability to judge someones age,
or, also may have asked me for reasons unknown to me for proving my age. When I showed my German passport, it was said: "I am not familiar with this document. I cannot accept it." If I was foolish, I started an argument right there and then.
Why? Because my very good friend recommended to me that if a cashier stubbornly refuses to sell me alcohol, I should call for "the manager" (so it was clear, that this happens a lot). I don't know, if I ever did that, I hope not. But I vaguely remember that I found myself in those kinds of situations and also my friend did it and I witnessed it, don't nail me down on this. For sure, I know, it happened to my brother. And he he had the most hilarious argument at the shop with a guy who refused to be talked to.
He eventually called for the manager
and, be sure of it, the manager settled the case and my brother walked away with his bottle of whatever liquor.
Would you say that this was a success?
Somewhat, yes, in terms of having finally gotten the desired good, right?
When I today think of those episodes and how I would have reacted with the present me, I think I would have shrugged at the cashier, handing over the bottle and walk away to buy it somewhere else. Or, if I would have liked to have a bit of a thrill, I'd wait ten minutes, walk back into the shop, go to a different cashier and buy it from this other person.
If I would like having a somewhat bigger thrill,
I'd wait half an hour, go back into the shop, grab myself a bottle and walk right back to the same cashier to see if the same thing happens again. Maybe, I've even done that back then, I really don't know anymore.
What I would not do is "calling for the manager." If I am unable to settle this kind of everyday episode with the other human involved, I might leave it or challenge it in a way which includes some fun for me. More, by playing it nice than in this "I have a right!" attitude.
If humor does not happen to be in my possession,
it's better to not start an argument, for I will probably lose it (not losing in the sense that the other one wins but losing in front of myself).
The other reason that I would not call the manager is, that this would give us involved a poor testament. Like, being unable to come to terms without another party (accepted as authority). The cashier gets confirmed that it's not him who settles a matter, the manager gets confirmed that a cashier is incapable of handling an uncertain case of "how old is some one and can I accept a foreign passport". The manager gets the impression that he now must step in and provide a decision.
Would I be the manager,
I would not step in but ask the cashier to handle the situation on his/her own. I'd ensure all involved that I am very confident they can handle it all by themselves and walk away (even if I wasn't). Like a judge who dismisses a case out of irrelevance. Which it is, not relevant.
But what do I really know?
Nothing. It also can be that the manager and the cashiers have agreed on a certain strategy when it comes to sell alcohol. Like fulfilling a certain percentage of situations where people are asked for their ID's and cause a bit trouble so all the other customers can see "how much the shop cares for the law". In case, a customer makes big trouble, the cashiers duty is fulfilled and it can be called for the manger. HaHa!
Not, that this would be my strategy at all.
The other day,
when I was out to buy some presents for my hubby I strolled through the section where you can buy all kinds of candies and fine chocolates. There, I saw the most ridiculous sign:
"No sale of chocolates with alcohol to minors under 18 years of age."
I tried to imagine how one human can get drunk on pralinés!
How many do you have to eat to get the same impact as you get from drinking a bottle of beer, wine or other liquors?
Luckily, I never ever witnessed people, not even teenagers, here in my country being asked for their IDs in the grocery.
That speaks volumes, I think.
The teens, who do want to get hold on the stuff find ways to do it anyways, because, after all, it's sold all over the places! And the cashiers seem still to be ignorant enough to not bothering their customers in this regard.
I even don't know if you are actually not already allowed to buy beer at the age of 16. HaHa! That speaks volumes, too, I think.
Have a friendly day.
picture source: mine (the chocolate box I bought)
This made me laugh. I was actually carded the other day, and I look old as hell. No way could i ever be mistaken for being under the legal age, hahahaha.
The laws here are so harsh for selling to minors many stores have implemented policies for their employees that wont leave the discretion in their hands. I know in another state I lived in the police would often send underage folks in to see if they could drum up some arrests and fines for the establishments.
The alcohol chocolates shows just how absurd things have gotten, lol. Thinking if ones stomach could not get sick from all of the chocolate one would need eat to catch a buzz they earned it for sure.
:D HaHa! Glad you had a good laugh.
Exactly. As this seems to happen a lot, I asked myself what possibly could motivate the cashiers in doing so? Strange. Maybe they are so tired of doing such things that they just randomly ask customers for their IDs, no matter how old they look, just to show that they ask at least a couple of times a day. LOL
A statement I once heard referred to the possible alternatives I can consider when I want to shape a situation according to my preference. The more alternatives I think of, the more it gives me the feeling that I don't have to choose only between two things.
The supermarket situation served as a proxy for this view of alternatives, without anyone having to consciously lose face in the process. It targets human inattention in such a way that it uses it creatively (launching more alternative attempts to get the desired bottle).
The absurdity of the sign in the sweets department makes obvious the exaggeration we have to deal with in many places. I can only make fun out of it.
To put it drastically, a situation is only completely without alternative when I am directly in mortal danger and there are no further creative ways to get me out of it.
Taking a certain risk is necessary in all situations where one's own will is opposed to that of another. Either by directly cheating (breaking a law) with the risk of getting caught. Or just more sophisticated, witty ideas to circumvent conflicts.
I think the creative ideas get too little attention because I see a tendency towards open conflict/friction or a total avoidance of thinking about alternatives.