I feel like I watched all the movies in the world, it is hard to get old

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The part of growing up I guess is not feeling any excitement from what we do, from the things we always like to do, in short, to get bored of it all. Like for example about watching movies in my case and maybe for everyone else, it had gotten boring already. One part is that I can't see most of my favorite actors and actresses two decades ago not doing movies anymore because either they had gone old or they passed-away.

The thing is that when we grow up, life seems to be passing by so fast. For my case since I can't move around much it is like I want to fast forward in order to see a better day, maybe that day will not come and like spending my years waiting for a bus that will not arrive, like time is an onion now for me that I peel layer by layer until the whole onion is no more, just destroyed.

It is an ever-changing world, we must adapt in the process and cope with changes because it is what it is. So happy those that are still entertained by Wrestling (The TV shows) because once upon a time it is really pleasurable to watch it until the inevitable time that you learn that even though they perform dangerous stunts, they are just acting for the sake of the show.

So in that regard I envy my Father who still watches wrestling matches from his smartphone and entertained by it which is why as said, "ignorance is a bliss". So maybe a brain condition like completely forgetting what happened yesterday makes your everyday full of hopes, dreams, excitement, curiosity, and adventure. Rather doing all that and getting bored of them all and then you're too old already to do it again and you simply fade-away in some institution or a secluded room like mine.

it would have been better if we get old and never to be subjected to threats and hardships but with the current situation of my life and add to that from what is happening the world, a big chunk of the rest of my life seems to be pointless to continue in struggling away. That is why I have to be braver and face the challenges, it will mean a hard life ahead and only getting bored from watching movies is just a symptom that I have to contend with.

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It has been a... life.

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