I felt sorry for myself today, not just today, for a few weeks.

I woke up and saw snow on the ground and cussed a little, to that I admit.
I have been restoring a motorbike for months now, all I want is a touch, a smell, a sense of warm ish weather to paint the frame so I can put it back together, then I read @kiwideb article on VYB sent to me by @frot, and I felt pathetic. Like I was complaining for the sake of it.
My gripe is weather, having to warm and heat a farm, the price of coal sky rocketing when I need it the most. It is 300% or 3 fold what it was 7 months ago so not buying any more. The reason apparently is because of the war next-door there is no more coal coming from the east, but we have a mine here only a few miles away but still the price is massively over inflated now.
And it hit me, I could have cut down so many trees last summer and not had to rely on coal, but I did not, I was busy doing other things, a mistake I will not make this year.
Here is an extract of Kiwidebs article and a link to it.

"New Zealand's day of shame."

"Word on the street was that the police were going to raid around 4am, so we didn't get much sleep. I imagine those holding the line got way less. I started the day crying as I watched scenes of the police pepper spraying and beating peaceful citizens, destroying private property and generally behaving like thugs. The day did not improve."

"Hundreds of police arrived on scene at dawn, with batons, riot gear and many with their ID numbers covered. Their aim seemed to be to totally clear Parliament grounds, though I don't know that the wanton destruction they created was entirely planned. They started in Hill St and Molesworth St. Those were the scenes that greeted me this morning, including a video of four or five of them beating and kicking one woman. One man was filming and was beaten with a riot shield till his hip broke. He was then left lying in the street for some hours. Other footage I saw tonight showed an elderly man being punched violently and collapsing onto the street."

Link to the article here https://www.vybrainium.com/vyb/@kiwideb/convoy-nz-2022-days-21

With almost the entire world relaxing the insane restrictions they put on people, why so much state violence in New Zealand?

Not only there but Canada too. A state of emergency and seizing bank accounts for protesting? Really? There is a real war in the Ukraine, I hardly think seizing bank accounts for a peaceful protest is ideal and is extreme to say the least.
Pepper spraying people into submission in New Zealand is hardly appropriate neither.
What have governments become? Monsters???????
When people have a genuine complaint, any government should listen & speak to those they supposedly represent, but none have.
They claim talking to us is the same as talking to a terrorist.
I am unsure how much more people can take of the beatings, the spray, government torture full stop.
I do hope you spend the time to read her article, she clearly states facts and makes no assumptions - neither does she attribute blame, not sure I would be so kind if it was me and my country.

The pictures coming out of the Ukraine are horrendous.

War is something I have never understood anyway, especially the wanton destruction part, the bombing peoples homes, if dictators want a fight why not just fight each other? But somehow we are tricked into thinking it is all for the better good, the lesser evil, we are saving people by bombing them into oblivion, but hey they will be free, "we are doing it for their own good, honestly" mentality, heard it all before.

Another reason I have had to snap out of my own pathetic awaken today.

I have guests arriving Friday, a young lady, small child, father, 1 dog, 1 cat. And they are relying on me. They too fled this war.
I have agreed to help as many as I can, but even my place can not house them all.
It is a very long story what has happened, where they went etc so I will spare you the details. Now with coal being so expensive and not even I want to live at the farm in this weather I am finding them alternative accommodation.
So my day will be spent today finding them a long term solution with gas and all services included, one they can afford to stay in long term as the war seems never ending.

There are refugees everywhere here, estimated at over 1 million, the borders are jammed full with people trying to escape, everyone that comes needs a place to stay. I had thought about offering some land so people can at least camp, but that option is no longer viable with snow on the ground is it.

Anyway I feel certain I can find these people something suitable, and as the weather is not showing signs of getting any better "sunshine, what is that?" must be the global warming hey, I am going to have to find them something.

I feel bad now about waking up in such a bad mood based only on weather and not being able to finish building a motorbike when I have so many.
Note to self, "wake up in a better mood tomorrow".