We've all been told our whole lives that we should focus on the positive and look on the bright side of life. But how does that help when you face real adversity or rejection?
The biggest obstacle to achieving the results you want in life is self doubt. Self doubt is the voice inside your head that whispers that you can't do it. It tells you you're stupid and you're not good enough.
Self doubt doesn't go away when you face rejection. This is why your mind has become a prison for you. A prison where you think everything is against you.
The antidote to self doubt is resilience. Resilience helps us overcome rejection. This post will cover three main methods of building resilience:
Take Control of Your Mindset
Recognize Rejection and Rejection-Based Pain
Understand The Power Of Rejection
STEP 1: Take Control of Your Mindset
In the moment, it's hard to think rationally when you're upset. Your mind becomes a tornado of emotion and irrational thought. In order to take control of your emotions, you need to identify the thoughts that are causing them and replace them with rational ones.
Steps to Take:
Focus on the big picture, not the details. What is really important right now? Is there anything I can do about this?
Try to find a silver lining. If you're having a bad day or getting rejected, ask yourself what you can learn from this.
Reflect on past failures. Ask yourself if you've learned anything from them. How did you handle them? What do you know now that you didn't know before?
Focus on the process, not the result. What did you do right? What do you plan to do next? What's the next step?
STEP 2: Recognize Rejection And Rejection-Based Pain
Once you start to recognize rejection, you may feel rejection-based pain in your body. Recognizing that you're getting rejected is actually the first step towards getting better. We don't need to pretend that rejection is going to help us; we just need to acknowledge that it's happening and then use that awareness to improve.
The first step in overcoming rejection-based pain is realizing it's happening. Rejection-based pain can come in various forms. Sometimes it's a physical pain that feels like an ache or cramp. Other times, it's a mental pain that may show itself in a variety of ways. For example, it may feel like guilt, shame, anger, loneliness, frustration, etc.
If your rejection-based pain is physical, you may want to find a distraction so that you don't focus on the pain. You can do a few things to distract yourself.
Take a walk
Listen to music
Engage in a hobby
Do something that you enjoy
If you don't have any options, you can simply meditate.
If your rejection-based pain is emotional, you may feel guilty about
Very good advice