We all want to connect, build relationships and understand each other. We also want to have our needs met and feel heard. This post includes techniques for building empathy so you can create amazing connections and relationships with others.
STEP 1: Identify the Empathy Type That Best Describes You
Many of us are capable of more than one type of empathy. For example, I’m empathic in my relationships but analytical in my professional ones. So which type of empathy is most important for you to develop? It depends on who you want to be a part of your life, and what you want to get out of it.
In my book The Art of Intimacy, I explore four main types of empathy:
Empathic – Someone who has the ability to understand the emotional state of another person, even when they’re having difficulty communicating.
Analytical – Someone who understands and sees the world from an objective point of view.
Social – Someone who enjoys connecting with people in social situations and enjoys helping others.
Sensitive – Someone who is able to emotionally resonate with another person, feeling what they feel and needing the same things they need.
Which empathy type describes you most? Let's look at the benefits of each of the types of empathy.
Empathic Relationships
Empathic relationships are the most powerful relationships we can create. These relationships enable us to understand others, make ourselves better and find happiness.
We tend to focus on the benefits of analytical relationships. But empathic relationships offer many of the same rewards. An empathic relationship doesn't only make us better. It also brings us a greater sense of self-worth and joy.
Analytic Relationships
Analytical relationships allow us to take an objective stance, giving us the ability to see other people as they really are. Because they help us move away from our emotions, they often lead to disconnection, lack of respect and self-destructive behaviors.
Analytical relationships can be extremely rewarding, because they allow us to avoid being pulled in by others’ emotions. Unfortunately, this tends to mean that we are disconnected from our own emotions and experiences.
Social Relationships
Social relationships are the foundation of a happy life. Social relationships require us to be willing to connect with others, help them and support them.
Without a social network, we won’t have access to the people and resources we need to become successful. Social relationships create a positive feedback loop, motivating us to continue doing the things that we enjoy, which in turn increases our self-esteem and connection to others.
Sensitive Relationships
Sensitive relationships are the foundation of authentic, intimate and loving relationships. When we connect on an emotional level with someone, we build trust. This in turn enables us to have more freedom to express ourselves and share our feelings.
When we understand what others are feeling, it makes it easier for us to take their needs into account.