People should be taught to accept responsibility. It's essential in order to succeed. We are all responsible for all that we do whether we like it or not.
The first step in accepting responsibility is to understand what it is. The key point here is that we all have feelings and at some time we will have an impulse to take the blame for something that we didn't do. So the first key point is to be able to accept responsibility. All you could do in those cases is to accept responsibility as regards the emotions you feel when around those people who blame you.
The second key point is that we should be able to accept responsibility as regards something we did wrong or as regards our contribution to some event that happened. If we accept responsibility as regards the contribution we made, it means that we are responsible for that particular event. Similarly, if we accept responsibility as regards something we did, it means that we are responsible for the consequences of our actions.
Thirdly, we must stop blaming others. In other words, we should stop pointing fingers and start taking responsibility. Blaming somebody else for your mistakes, shortcomings, failures, misfortunes and bad luck is just like blaming God for what happened. It is just not realistic and it just doesn't help; on the contrary, it encourages others to continue doing what they are doing which is to cause you more problems than it would have if you had just accepted responsibility?
The fourth key point is that we should accept responsibility as regards the change we need to make. There are times when we need to make changes and sometimes we cannot avoid making changes. But when we blame somebody else for these changes, it simply spreads negativity. And if we don't take action, it spreads even more negativity. Rather than spreading negativity, it is better if we could actually take action ourselves towards the changes that we need to make.
The fifth and most important key point regarding accepting responsibility is that whenever things go wrong, it is always the responsibility of somebody else. Nobody can do anything about things going wrong. Whether it is the mistake or absence of effort that causes things to go wrong, it is the other person's responsibility and they should accept responsibility towards that.
And the sixth and the last key point is that we should accept responsibility as regards solving the problem. Whenever we blame somebody or refuse to take responsibility, it is just like saying 'We are not going to do it because it is not our responsibility. It is not our fault that these things are happening.' It is just like saying, 'We did not do it because it is not our fault.' It is saying, 'We did not do it because we did not choose to do it.'
Those are the key points on which the question of whether or not people accept responsibility and pursue excellence boils down. It is a very important question to ask. We often look at people and say, 'Oh, they did not do it because it is not their fault,' and that is a really big reason why so many people are stuck in low places in life. And there are also many people in the world who, because of the beliefs that they have, are avoiding taking responsibility and pursuing excellence. That too needs to be changed.
The other key point is that it is not correct to blame somebody for your bad things happening. You cannot allow yourself to blame somebody else or say, 'If only he had only done this, or only done that, or...' The first thing to say is, 'I caused you to be in the position that you are in today; I am the responsible party here; you must accept responsibility for your actions and your life.' And, if you do that, then you will not be able to blame anybody else or say anything like that. So, when somebody asks you, 'Why didn't you do this? Why did you do that?'
The answer to that question really does not change the fact that you still need to accept responsibility for your actions and the choices you make. Now, when you take responsibility for your choices, what that means is that you become the agent - the catalyst - that can actually bring about change. When you blame somebody or hold someone responsible for their choices and actions, you are blocking your own ability to be a catalyst or agent that can actually change things. In other words, by taking responsibility for your choices, you are removing the ability for anyone to hold you responsible. You are simply saying, 'I am no longer in control of this so what do you have to do now?'
So, when you are asked, 'why did you make the decisions you made today?' What you need to do is honestly answer that question and stop looking for somebody else to blame for what you have done. Stop trying to convince yourself that you can make mistakes, accept personal responsibility for your actions and then convince yourself that you are no longer in control of your life. If you do that, you will be able to move forward with confidence and actually believe that you have changed your life because you are no longer in the position you were in before making the choices that you have made.
