Diffusing family issues begins with changing your inner conversations. By identifying and changing the negative thoughts and feelings that fuel the dysfunction in your family, you can foster a healthy communication style with your family members. This will help you establish boundaries with your family and your ex-in-law, and have a more effective conversation with them. You may also need to remove yourself from the situation in order to defuse it.
Changing your inner conversations can help you have a sensitive conversation with a family member or ex-in-law
Sometimes family communication is not productive. This may happen if you're challenged and you feel defensive. You may end up making things even worse by fighting back. But, you can change your inner conversations to help you have the sensitive conversation you want.
Establishing boundaries with a family member or ex-in-law
The issue of setting boundaries can feel like a black and white issue. Some people see boundaries as a blockage, while others see them as an important way to protect themselves from toxic relationships. Regardless of your personal preferences, it is important to understand that setting healthy boundaries is not about shutting people out. Instead, boundaries should be a means to diffuse family conflicts by changing your inner conversations and avoiding confrontation.
When setting boundaries with your in-laws, it is important to be realistic and understand that there are times when it is impossible to prevent every misunderstanding. Your in-laws may not share your ideologies or beliefs, and that can lead to a fight. However, by establishing boundaries early and in a thoughtful way, you can repair your relationship and diffuse family conflicts.
Removing yourself from a loved one's situation can help defuse the situation
When a loved one has dementia, it's essential to maintain your emotional and physical distance. Don't criticize them or try to reason with them; this only escalates the situation. Likewise, don't stand over them or make threats. Rather, step back and ask for help.