Oftentimes, it is not men who encourage women to stay in abusive marriages or relationships.
Everytime a woman is enduring an abusive marriage, it is often because of another woman somewhere who is encouraging her to stay put and see what God could do or for her to fight for her marriage.
Ladies, everytime you are told to fight for your marriage, it is actually not the marriage you are fighting for. What you are doing is, you are risking your life to withstand a psychologically damaged man.
Things could go wrong along the way – you could get killed or fractured physically.
Men are aware that changing a man with a damaged upbringing is not automatical; hence, a man will never advise his sister to endure physical abuse in marriage.
Our fathers always would tell their son-in-law to not lay a filthy hands on their daughter. If he's tired of her, he should return her. Why?
Most men were never properly raised. Social commentaries are always on how the girl child is raised. Nothing about how a boy is raised makes it to discourses, charters and conventions.
Boys who are not raised to cook, respect their sisters, do chores, observe their moms, etc. may turn out to be abusive to their wife.
We must be intentional about the upbringing of our boys.
Men are supposed to be forged like machines because they need tough skin to withstand pressure, take in so much, go through everything, and still be firm for their wife and family.
We need to channel more energy into raising boys. It's not healthy when a boy grows to become a man without a healthily forged masculinity.
