My way of healing

Last few days I have just not been on the right track, and I find myself sulking around and pouring out my heart and all those negative emotions about almost everything, which is not typically me, but then I have to accept that somewhere it's a part of me. When I reflect back on these kind of days, I realize that this is my way of healing from the situation. I want to express it out, I do not like to keep it within me, because that makes me feel suffocated and suppressing myself. For me there are 2 ways to heal, one is by talking about it again and again till the time I feel it's all come out of me and there is nothing more left inside and the other is getting out in the nature, like going to the beach or to the mountains. Both these places are healing for me. I did that exactly, I went for a long beach walk and by the end of it, I was feeling much better.

We all have our ways to heal. I do not think there is anything right or wrong about it. It's just the way that suits us. Life is not a straight line so these ups and downs are going to be there and it's all a part of learning. I like to do what my heart guides me, there are days when I do not like to even pray and I stay calm on such days and just accept my feelings the way they are. I believe that the first step towards healing is to accept your whole self, the positives and the negatives, all of them. Because till you do not confront each and every part of your's, you will never understand what needs to be healed.

Source

This is a little off -track, but I will like to share. Many years back, when I was learning all the different healing modalities and I had just kicked off my journey into the space. My teacher told me that I had lot of ego in me. I refused to accept that statement, because till then everyone had told me that I was a very loving and humble person. But then she told me, just observe yourself and you will understand. I started doing that and I realized yes, that I had lot and lots of ego. I was always feeling that I do not need help from others, rather I was the one who should always help others. I would never dare to expose my vulnerable side out to anyone. I always felt that I cannot show myself weak to anyone, and taking help was the last thing that I would want to do. When things would not go my way, it would upset me, all these are signs of ego. I was never able to surrender and that was my first step towards understanding healing in real sense. I had to accept myself first to heal that part of me.

I have made it a practice to address every emotion of my and not being afraid to confront it and speaking it out, whether it is a positive one or negative one. I stopped bothering on how others will perceive me. That's the only way I can process it and heal myself.

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