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Expectation sometimes hinders a lot of people in a relationship. We expect too much and when we receive way less than our expectations, we feel sad and need to change our partner. It's shocking. You have high expectations, yes but have you forgotten your partner have such high expectations too? You should live up to those expectations as much as you want him or her to match up too. Be realistic. Whatever your partner can afford for you, from the place of sacrifice, no matter how little it seems, accept it. It is always the heart and the thought about it that matters. Don't forget I said, from the place of sacrifice. Sadly, most people are in a relationship but they don't understand what sacrifice means. They want others to sacrifice for them but they won't move an inch. Being in a relationship is a call to sacrifice, love, selflessness and understanding.
Look for special occasions and do something nice if you don't have that inherent trait of giving. I understand that our background has a lot to do with the way we turn out and that's why we need to learn these things because any right-thinking human will go to where he or she is celebrated rather than where they are tolerated. If you don't know now, this is a good time to learn. Your background should never be the reason why your back would be on the ground. At least, if you have a giving partner, let that action spur you to desire doing something nice for your partner too. A relationship requires a lot and you have to be observant too.
How can you watch your partner be the giver and you are not moved in any way to do something nice for him or her too for a change? You need to understand that they are not inclined to be with you except you are both married anyway and if they see someone nice enough to be a giver like they are, the heart would naturally draw in that direction. Actions solidify love and as humans, there is only so much that the heart can take. This is why I always want people to go into a relationship with their heart and their head. The head would make you see if you are both heading somewhere and the heart would balance things and allow you to give them enough time to at least one better. You can't keep making your partner feel unimportant and except them to still stick around. This is real life and not a movie zone.
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Don't just sit back and expect the guy to do everything. This is your life, show responsibility too. He has the choice of doing it or not doing it too, remember, so don't make it a right! Anybody in love should know without being told that giving is part of love and it requires both parties since you are both in love. What you give might vary based on your incomes, yes, but let it be from a place of sacrifice knowing you gave up something. It is always a good feeling, I don't know about others but to me, it is.
Guys, whatever they offer unto you, accept it from the place of love. It doesn't have to match up to what you gave her but see from the aspect that she could have chosen not to but she did it anyway. We all want to do things better but I will never indulge anyone who sees it as a right and would try to guilt their way around it.
The joy and happiness of your spouse should be important to you. Giving is relative. You can give your time, words, efforts and all but in this case, I am talking about material giving. Let's be real, we don't live for it, yes but who wouldn't want to be spoiled a little too? We are humans after all. If you don't know how to, learn it. Get him a belt. Buy her that shoe you saw her checking online and craving for. Help him get that shirt and let him wear it to his first interview. Forget about "What if he or she changes afterwards after I have invested so much" then the question is, "Why did you stay too long in a relationship as uncertain as this when you already saw the warning signs?".
If you are still on the lookout for someone to date, giving to such a person might be a way of signalling your intent. I am not asking you to give just to impress him or her but act within your budget because if you start what you can't sustain, you have given that person a false value of who you are. Giving is an expression of care not because you want to buy them over but because you are signalling your intent and they are not mandated to take it, so don't feel bad if the feeling is not the same rather admire the honesty.
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
Still me,
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order.