Photo by Jasmin Ne on Unsplash, Design by Guridio
As we search for ourselves, we sometimes feel uncomfortable and unbelievable as we reflect on our past values and choices.
Maybe it's because what we once dreamed of, we don't need anymore, or maybe it's because we still cling to the choices we made at 21 or 31, which are outdated.
So, we don't want to live a life that is easy anymore, and we really want to live a life that is more authentic and more appropriate. To live authentically is to show the real you to others.
Your outward lifestyle reflects your beliefs, your values, your commitments and your inner truth.
The more you live authentically and be true to yourself, the more inner peace you will have. What is it to live authentically?
You may refer to the following suggestions:
- Act according to your own values.
- Make decisions according to your own ideas (not others).
- Feeling like you can be your true self and be loved by others without having to be false in order for others to accept you.
- Accepting and respecting all of yourself without having to hide or deceive. Communicate honestly with people, even if this causes conflict or tension.
- If you're not sure a relationship is worth it, you won't settle down hastily.
- Be straightforward with others about what you want and need. If you want to be true to yourself, you must do this.
Yet, when our authentic self calls us, we stubbornly refuse it, holding on to that familiar role from the past that refuses to let go. While those roles may no longer fit into the present and may limit us, we're more afraid that we'll change too much and end up losing those identities, becoming....
That's the problem, and we're not sure what it will become.
Letting go of our old roles makes us feel like we have no identity, nowhere to hide, as if we've become invisible. We ask ourselves, "What would I be if I wasn't a wife, mother, doctor, good son, reliable person, dutiful daughter-in-law, super-successful person, loyal employee, and friend who goes out of her way to make a difference?" We don't know the answers.
Ironically, whether we know the answers or not, in our refusal to change, in our clinging to choices that have long since fallen out of fashion, we have given up much of what is good.
As a result, relationships become lackadaisical, work becomes boring, and life becomes bleak!