...."Ah... shit" God said very dejectedly, after listening to Lucy's reasoning, "You're bloody well right..."

There was a heavy silence in the room as they all looked at each other, surprised by what Lucy had just said...
Even Lilith had stopped playing with herself and just stared at him, not happy at all with her mojo being wrecked....

"I do have one suggestion..." Lucy said quietly "...

An I gotta say right now, from the off, that I'm not really sure that it'll work..."

He told them his thoughts...

"Oh, this is turning into a right farce!" Rahpy said, after hearing what Lucy had to say... "Can't you just delete the whole project and start again?"

"No I bloody well can't !" God shouted, "I'll make this bugger work, even if it kills me!"

Lucy laughed so loudly that an entire galaxy was instantaneously blown out of existence,

"That's so funny !" He said,....

"I wonder if one of those naked bears down there will ever write a book, called 'God is Dead?'...That'd be so hilarious !!!"

Adding....
"...But not nearly as hilarious as a Penguin shuffling around Wales, looking for anchovies, and riding a cat."...
...reminding everyone in the room what his new solution to Gods problem, might entail...

It was then that God said to everyone - very, very quietly ....that he'd also given the all the people free will...as a kind of fun experiment.

“Are you serious? Lucy said loudly.

"You gave them all, total free will?
They'll be off doing all kinds of weird shit in no time..oh shit, this changes everything !"

“You're really pissing me off now,” God said to Lucy sharply “You're always so bloody negative.”

“Well, excuse me!” Lucy replied haughtily, “It was you who created me, complete with free will and a brain, so stop projecting any of your own deficiencies onto me, will ya?...I can't believe that you gave the naked bears total free will though, I really can't... ”

God let out a long moan, and a deep, sigh...
And Lilith emerged once more from under the table, licking her lips and dribbling some stars onto her chin.

“You know what, Lucy?”, God said very calmly, "You're right. I have been most remiss.”

The office went silent.
It was never a good sign of things to come, not when God took on this tone of voice.

“This is what's gonna happen...” God said.

He explained his plan to them...

Several millennia later...

The angels left the office silently, looking at each other.

“Well, I'm not doing it.” One of them said petulantly, "You do it..."

“I'm not doing either, fuck that.” Another chimed in, “ I make supernova's, I ain't doing that whole 'babysitting naked bears', thing.”

“Look, I'm sorry, all right?” Lucy said, looking around, “If I knew he was gonna fly off the handle like that I would have kept my mouth shut... Jeeeez, give an angel a break.”...

“Well, you've been given the head job anyway, and he's the boss.” Raphael chirped up, enjoying the fact immensely that that he'd not being given the task himself.

“Yeah, I know that, but I'm gonna need some help. I can't do all that shit on my own ya know,” Lucy replied.

“I'll come with ya,” Lilith said, “He told me to bugger off as he can't concentrate on his work properly with me around," Adding petulantly, "Some Gods have no sense of gratitude, you know that?”

“Thanks hun,” Lucy said, putting his wing around her shoulder, “I'd really appreciate the company.”

“I'm telling you now though, ” She said, “I ain't at all happy about it. Those naked bears want some knowledge so badly ? I'll give 'em some freakin' knowledge.”

Lucy laughed.
“ I knoooooooooow....Be careful what you ask for, eh?”, chuckling to himself..

“So when will we be able come home?” Lilith said to Lucy.

“Well, if things go according to mister smarty pants's, plan,” He said, nodding towards God's office, “I reckon that we might be home by tomorrow evening. It's only seven or eight millennia, max...So no biggie.”

“So all we have to do,” Lilith said, “ Is to convince 'em that we are like, really, really bad ass, to make God look like reeeeally, really good ? That shouldn't be too difficult.”

“It's not that simple,” Lucifer replied.

“We can't show ourselves in their reality, summat to do with their brains melting, and we can't force 'em to do anything, either. He's a bloody stickler for keeping that free will rule, even for naked bears...”

“We can't force 'em?...Seriously? ” Lilith said, bewildered, “Ah, shit...Then how are we supposed to get anything done?”

“What we are gonna have to do, my sweet Lilith,” Lucy said, “Is to convince 'em that we're both such total twats that they'd prefer to give up any idea of ever wanting to gain more knowledge, because doing so, would mean having to deal with us two.”

“Okaaaaaaaay..” Litlith replied, still not too sure of how to proceed, “And just how are we supposed to do that then?”

"Well, what I was thinking, is this...” Lucy said, with a smirk, “...I reckon that if we can get a few peeps to swallow some hallucinogenics, we can convince 'em that we're actually big G himself.

....Then whatever we tell 'em, they'll think it's directly from him...

If we can convince 'em of that, then we can then get 'em to stop wanting to know anything more, because they don't wanna piss off the big man upstairs.

....If they believe that we are numero uno, from the cloud upstairs, then everything we tell 'em will be seen as the absolute truth. About God, the universe, life, and everything else in between,”

Adding quickly, “ Remember though, it's only until the discovery of Wales and after the Penguin completes the task. Then that's us done...Job jobbed, and then it's back to heaven, for tea time.”

They left heaven and headed down to earth, along with a few of their mates who'd kindly offered to help them out.

Lucy reminded Lilith to not break The Law while they were working, under no circumstances!

“Well, obviously,” She replied. “Durr...No one would be that stupid...would they?”

Lucy laughed so loudly at the idea that anyone would ever be so stupid to break The Law, that the clouds thundered and a lighting bolt struck a mountain top in somewhere that's now called 'the middle east'.

“You don't know much about how these naked bears operate, do you?” He said between guffaws.

“Truly, they're a group of semi mindless specs of stardust that hardly understands even one single word of The Law.”

“Really!?” Lilith said, shocked.

After thinking about it for a few decades and what this might mean, she giggled...

“Well.... I suppose that makes our job a lot easier, we'll look like a right group of twats if they don't know what The Law is...”

“Yes, indeed! ” Said Lucy. He was starting to think this job might not be so tedious afer all....

Think about, Lilith...You can go into men's' heads at night, and give 'em the stiffiest stiffy they've ever had with your images, then drink their spiritual jizz, and guess what?...They'll actually think that you're being completely horrible to them!!!!”

“No waaaaaaay!,” Lilith laughed, in total disbelief at the idiocy of the naked bears.

“Waaaaaaaaay!,” Lucy replied, laughing with her and giving her a high five while reaching around to give her bum a nice little squeeze. "I'm not joking!"

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