I recently made a post about being framed at work by someone who happens to be a contract supervisor, he became fond of me and we became close even though he was my superior. He treated me special which made me give my best when working for him but he used me to get rid of his fiancée and I became the bad guy to people who didn't listen to my side of the story.
He accused me of cheating with his fiancée who is probably seven or eight years older than me, he staged everything from the point of giving me her contact to the end; my height made me suffer that huge blow and I almost lost my job as a paster then but my former group picked me up even though I left them when they needed me most.
I was hurt then but I was able to get over it, I picked my pieces together and moved on but the memory didn’t just leave me.
I don’t want to share the story over and over again so I am writing an opposite scenario where I accused someone wrongly, I have not just been a victim of being accused wrongly; I have accused people wrongly as well.
After my first relationship crashed, I had a different perspective about the female gender and it made me insecure in my next relationship.
I am a free lover, I don’t double date or cheat so I wasn’t expecting my lover to do so as well but I was silly to think that way because every human wasn’t created the same. We think differently and react to things differently as well.
I usually see lots of guys around my first lover; I felt it was normal because I have lots of female friends as well. I went to visit her on a particular day and she left me sitting, while she left with another guy after giving me a silly excuse. Her friend told me I was wasting my time but I thought she was jealous because she once wrote me a message expressing her feelings for me so I thought she just wanted to end the relationship.
I eventually caught her and I was hurt. It gave me an impression that every female is like that so I took extra caution in my next relationship.
I was always investigating, and spying on my new girlfriend so I didn’t enjoy the relationship because I was always suspecting every move she made.
She plays the keyboard and my love for music got me really into her but this investigator role I was playing in the relationship wouldn’t just make me see the beauty of the relationship. She usually have male instrumentalist around her, I know many wanted her but I wasn’t sure of her dedication to me.
So it happened that there was another guy who plays an instrument as well, they were very close. They were in the same music band and I felt very uncomfortable about their friendship, I didn’t trust having them around each other.
We were barely three months and I nagged always, she always tried to convince me that nothing is going to take her away but my previous lover said the same thing to me so it wouldn’t just work with promises for me.
I kept on with my act and on a fateful day, I accused her of dating the guy while in a relationship with me, and she poured out her mind. I still remember the statement, "this is not the George I used to admire a lot, we are still young and we know what we want so why are you making me feel like I am going to have problems in the future".
I apologized and told her my fears, she was sad I didn’t trust her as I always claimed. From that day she was completely a different person to me, she gradually built a gap until we were further apart. I got to know she was somehow related to the same guy but she never mentioned it to me, I felt stupid but it was late.
She deserves a better guy than me, someone with better exposure and a mature mind. I apologized to her years after and we became friends, nothing more. We weren’t even together for six months before my behavior ruined the beautiful future we saw with each other but I learned not to judge everyone by the experience I have had in the past, this reminds me of a Yoruba saying that says, " if you don’t forget what happened yesterday, it would be hard to relate with new amazing people today".
It is all in the past and we are both happy in our respective relationship, I guess life only wanted me to pick up a vital lesson and that was why we met. I usually don't add her to my list of relationships because it was just too short and I messed up with her emotions.
Forgetting what happened doesn’t include the lessons life has thought us, you can do away with the experience but don’t forget the lessons.