Late last October I got back from Ireland and settled right back into a week of painting. Then a day of bread baking, soup making, cheese cutting and beer begetting. Friends and acquaintances invited to see, but that week only friends attending, which was understandable. People getting to know me will assume from the outside that I am a narcissist, which is just not true. (I am more echoist/empath). But I think people outside of art aren’t often forgiving of expressionists. Who are they anyway to have all that self-harming fun? On good days I can weaken the Buddha. On better days I humiliate the self, which doesn’t hurt any one, like a Congressperson or confident doctor will whenever there’s an opportunity for a lasting mid-size car payment. I don’t like me that much, but I do dig playing the fool once in a while to keep the passion fires burning. Also, I am an Advocate personality type according to an app using the Myers-Briggs indicator. Real scientists, members of the American Psychological Society, doctors with Acuras and Sonatas, and up-to-date information on what’s right and wrong in our human heads, say that the Meyers-Briggs assessment is pseudoscience. The same group also kept homosexuality on the books as a diagnosable mind disease until 1987. That must have made millions of people very depressed and thousands dead. I consider all science to be pseudo (and depressingly dangerous) unless it isn’t. I also believe good things can come from pseudoscience. For instance, Newtonian physics is a 350 year old pseudoscience that gave us air travel. Rose and I didn’t fall screaming from seven miles high on our recent trip to Ireland, thank god—which itself could be the end product of the new theoretical science experiments catching up to supernaturalism. The old religions, moreso than the new sciences, are prone to love and care for others while the scientific powers deliver catalysts for quick mutilation to their friends and families. Where would the terrorized people of Gaza be without Islam? U.S.-Israeli science (not supernaturalism) is doing its absolute best to shrapnel-imbed the soft tissue of Muslim children, who will need a nirvana to hope for while their more down-to-earth rituals get bulldozed.
So I am an advocate according to an app which uses Meyers-Briggs to determine personality types. It’s spot on, for me at least. You might want to take the half hour test yourself. See if it helps answer some of the wonderings of why you’re you.
Here are five quotes from the overview that describe the parts of my personality that drive me to hope for impossibilities:
For Advocate personalities, success doesn’t come from money or status but from seeking fulfillment, helping others, and being a force for good in the world.
Conscientious to the core, they move through life with a clear sense of their values, and they aim never to lose sight of what truly matters – not according to other people or society at large, but according to their own wisdom and intuition.
Advocates may be introverted, but they value deep, authentic relationships with others.
Advocates are hardwired to right the wrongs of the world, no matter how big or small.
While Advocates may seem quiet or reserved to the world at large, they absolutely light up around their close friends. Few things bring them more pleasure or delight than talking through their passions, interests, and beliefs with a kindred spirit. People with this personality type enjoy the pleasure of their own company, but Advocates still find it liberating to let their guard down and be completely and utterly themselves with a friend they know they can trust, at least for a couple hours a week (bold italics mine).
All very positive, I know. It’s a service to purchase. Few would offer a credit card for mountains of real dirt on their personality. It’s better business to be reminded of the good side of ourselves. The test is free and they provide an overview that is enlightening. Try it.
I thought of Friday mini-exhibitions to help keep me engaged with the painting process through winter. Work the week like everyone around me, and then gather together for a happy hour. Free soup, bread and beverage. Time for repair. Paintings on the wall to encourage local art (all art is local) and anarchism in the heart and soul.
The following week I would show the calligraphy drawn by teacher and painter, Sewall Oertling. It appeals to my advocate personality. It goads me to share the probable wonders of the pseudosciences to my friends:
Sewall gave several translations. I’ll wrap them up into a paragraph:
Do the Stuckist and/or Zen Buddhist thing and work for the pleasure of working, work for no reward, work (and exhibit) to become a zero. Work to be a nothing, and want nothing more than to share this glorious realization to other human beings who are patient enough to sit through occasions of your design.
Home exhibitions are a big ask, I know. Usually, only friends can and will make the effort. They might look at the paintings or not. All I expect is a promise to slurp the soup and tell me a secret. I cannot speak for my guests, but I still don’t respect myself with the ardor necessary to instigate a life worth living. I feel that if I can invite people in while fooling myself, over and over again, then a foundation will be set, and we can build from there. I’ve botched the career, though I’ve never stopped working. And for some inexplicable gut reason, I feel the need to exhibit this personal truth as often as I can.
Maybe I long for a rebirth in the art and pseudosciences. Maybe I’m a lone canary in the culture coal mine. The pendulum swinging.
Maybe we need a lot more mistakes to happen, maybe more fools to transpire…
Now to share the close up of that first Friday wall. Come to my next exhibition. Bring your own work to show if you feel so inclined. One Friday, the sculptor brought his latest piece and set it on the table (last pic). Couldn’t avoid talking about that! I’d rather this happy hour Stuckism evolve into a grown-up show and tell. I don’t need to be the only exhibitionist in the room.
4 hours and 16 Kilometers of Kilarney 2023. Acrylic on loose canvas 22 x 21"
At Dublin Airport I Cried Like a Kerry Cow to “Endless Love” 2023. Acrylic on loose canvas, 20 x 24"
The Last Child Soul of Gaza to Value Your Opinion 2023. Oil on canvas, 24 x 21"
Turning Time Around With My Dublin Donut 2023. Acrylic on canvas, 21 x 24"
5 Sheares Street, Cork. €376 + 20% Tip 2023. Acrylic on loose canvas, 21 x 22"
Half Penny Painting for a Hay Penny Bridge 2023. Acrylic on loose canvas, 25 x 19"
Mitochondrial Eve Wondering About her Children 2023. Marble 12 x 12 x 8 inches