started a new youtube channel for my music some are good some concepts some just because mostly clean but some do carry parental warnings :P
still trying to fill it slowly in no order 10 per day i refuse to upload a photo of my self or any thing hahaha 180 or so songs total
https://www.youtube.com/@Manuel78freemusic
- A Sad Farewell to Fatty
It had been a decade since my beloved cat, Fatty, first entered my life, and just a week ago, I had to say goodbye to her. Each time I feed her daughter, I feel the profound emptiness of her absence. It’s as if my heart, already scared and grown numb with time, is reminded of the love and joy she brought into my life. Yet,
despite the dull ache of grief that has settled within me, I still find myself shedding tears when memories of Fatty pounce back into my mind.
On that final night, I watched as Fatty grew weaker. She had always been such a vibrant spirit, playful and affectionate, but now she was a shadow of her former
self. It was late, and the cold night air was palpable. I knew she wanted to go outside; I could see it in her eyes. Instinctively, I understood that this was a decision she was making, one that bore the weight of finality. Deep down, I felt the gnawing certainty that she would not return.
But as any devoted pet owner would, I clung to a shred of hope. I rolled over in bed, allowing myself to drift off to sleep, holding on to the belief that perhaps, I was wrong, and she would come back to me. The night was silent, save for the occasional rustle of leaves outside. I told myself that if she returned, she would need assistance; she was always dependent on me for care and comfort.
As I lay there, I was haunted by the memories of our time together. Fatty had been more than just a pet; she was a companion, a source of comfort, and a joy to have around. I remembered the way she would nuzzle against me when I was feeling down, her soft purring a soothing melody that could ease any troubled
mind. I recalled the countless nights we spent curled up under the covers, her warm body nestled against mine, a reminder that I was never alone.
But as dawn broke, a chilling realization washed over me. The time I had dreaded had come; she had not returned. I felt the weight of sorrow settle in my chest like
a heavy stone. The realization that I would never again hear her gentle purring or see her playful antics was almost unbearable. I had to face the truth: Fatty was gone, and I was left with bittersweet memories that both comforted and tormented me.
I spent the next few days in a haze of grief, going through the motions of life while feeling like a ghost in my own home. I could hear the echoes of her playful jumps and soft meows, reverberating in the silence that now filled every corner. Each time I fed her daughter, a wave of sadness would wash over me, a stark
reminder that Fatty was no longer there to share in the joy of feeding time, to playfully bat at the food as it fell into the bowl.
The days turned into weeks, and I tried to find solace in the memories we shared. I remembered the times we would sit together in the sun, her fur glistening in the
warm light, the way she would stretch and yawn, completely at peace. I thought of the adventures we had, the silly moments that made me laugh until I cried, and the quiet times when just being together was enough.
Yet, with every fond memory came the sting of loss. Fatty had been a constant
presence in my life, a source of unconditional love. The emptiness felt overwhelming, a void that could not be filled. I found myself questioning why we say goodbye to those we love. Why must we endure the pain of parting when all we want is to hold on to those precious moments forever?
I tried to honor her memory in small ways. I created a little space in my home where I could reflect on our time together. I placed her favorite toys, a soft blanket, and a framed photo of her in that spot. It became a sanctuary where I could sit and remember, to feel her spirit around me. I would talk to her, share my thoughts, and reminisce about our good times. It was a way to keep her
memory alive, to let her know that she would never truly be forgotten.
As the weeks turned into months, the sharp edges of my grief began to soften, though the ache remained. I learned to cherish the moments we had, to celebrate her life rather than dwell solely on her absence. I found comfort in
knowing she had lived a full life, one filled with love and happiness. Fatty had brought light into my life, and that light would always be a part of me.
I also realized that it was okay to feel sadness, to miss her deeply, and to grieve in my own way. Each tear I shed was a testament to the love we shared, a reminder of the bond that could never be broken. I began to understand that saying
goodbye does not mean forgetting; it means carrying those memories with us, allowing them to shape who we are.
Though I still felt the pangs of loss, I also felt gratitude for the time we had together. Fatty had taught me about love, companionship, and the beauty of life’s fleeting moments. I would forever hold her in my heart, a cherished
memory that would always bring a smile to my face, even amidst the sorrow.
In the end, I found strength in my memories and comfort in knowing that love transcends even the greatest of losses. Fatty had been my friend, my family, and though she was no longer physically present, her spirit lived on in the stories I shared, the love I gave, and the lessons I learned.
As I looked out into the world, I knew that one day, I would be ready to say hello again—to welcome a new companion into my life, to share love once more. But for now, I allowed myself to grieve, to remember, and to celebrate the beautiful
life of my dear Fatty. Each goodbye was a part of life’s journey, but it was also a reminder of the love that would always remain.
