I overheard my mother telling my sister that no matter what happens if she gets hospitalized that she should not get that breathing tube down her throat. It means that she should just be left to die if that need for her to be intubated to let her breathe for some reason should be done. Me upon hearing that makes me feel so depressed and sad, I even wept last night because seeing my mother suffer from unusual pain is also a pain to my physical body and emotions.
I thought that my mother is beginning to feel much better as I had said to my earlier post but she is still suffering from this very unusual pain. My father insisted that they should buy another Calcium supplement which I forbid them not to do because according to my father the Calcium supplement that my mother uses is "not curing her". I told them that the calcium is not a cure for pain particularly this unusual pain that my mother is experiencing.
This issue is difficult for me to bear mentally because I already do not know what to do unlike my physical pain issues which has a definite cause, but for my mother's pain issues I do not have any idea on how to tackle it. All that I know is that when my mother was younger, she is always having a complaint of body pain but now that she had gone older, those pains had gotten worse.
I had been so emotionally attached to my mother because she is also a source of my strength and I am dependent of her love and support because she is also an extension of my physical self and mental well-being because there mere presence of my mother around is enough for me to feel better. The thought of losing her is too much for my thoughts to bear and what more if she will not be around anymore, then I will face this void that no one can fill because that void is the love of a mother that is more than the value of the universe for me