Being creatively active is something which has been a part of my life since as far back as I can remember. As everyone knows, creativity takes on many forms and I have prettied much gotten involved in most things. One of my earliest creative adventures was piano playing. Something I have a great passion and love for. Sadly, however - I ended up having to sell my piano to pay the transfer fees on my first property purchase. I played for many years - struggled to read music, but loved to play by ear and also spent a lot of time making up my own tunes.
As a teen, I left school and started studying graphic design. I loved that course and despite not really knowing what I was getting myself into at the beginning (I just wanted to get out of school because I was failing hopelessly), it actually ended up steering a 23 year long career as a designer and business owner - one which I absolutely loved! But at the time of studying, I was nothing more than a turbulent and confused teenager, so spending my days creating at college and then coming home to sit in front of the piano was my bliss - my escape from the worries of my young world.
Once I graduated from college, all the jobs I went on to work at, were in the creative arenas. The second being in an art shop. During that time I made good use of what was at my disposal in the store by creating handmade greeting cards, which I then went on to sell on foot to all the business premises in the area, during my lunch breaks.
Beading was also something I have always loved and once the greeting card thing was going really well, I started making and selling beaded jewellery alongside that. Also a successful venture. Though I gave up on the jewellery side of things further down the line, I actually ended up selling the card business which went on for several years after that - of which I am aware.
At some point further down the line and after having worked as a graphic designer for several years in a few different companies, I eventually made the decision to start up my own business… and I never looked back. What a ride it was!
So yes, I have always been involved in creative endeavours. My late mom was a traditional artist and private art teacher too - it was actually through attending her classes that I developed what started out as simple curiosity for painting and then turned into a love! I will NEVER be able to compare to my mothers levels of talent… but then, on the flip side of that coin, our styles were always completely different anyway… so not really comparable in the first place.
My mom had breast cancer for quite a long time before she actually shared it with any of us, so in June 2020 her health took a very swift decline and she passed away quite suddenly… well, it felt sudden for all of us, though she had obviously been suffering silently for a fair time. Since her passing, I stopped any form of traditional painting. It was just too hard and everything about it made me miss her… so I just didn’t do it.
It took me three years to get to the point of feeling ready to step into that arena again - and that was in May this year. I went into the garage and took out all my moms paints and brushes and began unpacking them. I even found her art shirts… one even had a tissue in it. My mom always had a tissue stuffed somewhere… That nearly broke me all over again, but I powered through it and continued to sort through the paints - separating the oils from the acrylics giving everything its own place.
I wanted a permanent place to paint in my house, so I went out and looked through second hand shops until I found a piece which would be able to double as an easel and a positive aesthetic in the lounge when not in use. I found the perfect piece and grabbed it! In a way, all of this “procedure” was a little bit of procrastination if I am honest… like I was taking these baby steps to avoid actually getting to the part of painting. Though in hindsight, I think it was needed. My emotional state needed to take baby steps.
Once all of that was set up, I finally went out and bought THE BIGGEST canvas I could find. Go big or go home, right?! Lol! I took it home, stood it in its position and then stared at it in the plastic wrapping for about another month. I had some vague internal idea of what I was wanting to do… but I was not confident for quite a while, so it really was a slow process to getting to the point of actually ripping off the plastic and beginning!
I think a part of my lack of confidence in starting was for two primary reasons - one, my mom was no longer around to guide me and two, I had not picked up a paintbrush in three years. I am definitely more of an intuitive artist - I don’t really plan, I just DO… but unlike digital art, which I am more familiar with… there is no “ctrl Z” in the traditional art process, lol.
There was a quote I read a few years back which has always stuck with me. It is by Nikita Gill. I absolutely LOVE that woman's writing. She has the most incredibly powerful and magical talent. The quote goes…
“Reinvent yourself. Over and over again. Plant new wildflowers into your spirit. Set a wildfire inside yourself and then regrow. Take the wildest thing about you and nurture it till it blossoms. Tend to the sea that resides inside your heart and listen to its storms, wash you anew. How else will you let go of everything that causes you such terrible harm if you are still living inside the old you, the person who was so damaged by it all?”
Lying in bed one morning at about 5am, I was thinking about starting the painting and that quote popped into my head. Totally backwards to how I would normally operate - I decided the name of the piece before I had even begun it and the title was inspired by that quote.
THE REINVENTION
One Saturday afternoon, I poured myself a glass of wine and unwrapped the canvas. Drew the outline of the woman in pencil and then proceeded to picking up the first paints. Not surprisingly, most of my moms stuff had completely dried up - but I was determined to paint this entire thing with her materials… so I persevered.
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That afternoon marked the beginning of a three month creative and very emotional journey for me. There was SO much release throughout each stage of the creation and every moment impacted me differently. Once the jitters were out of the way, I just allowed everything to come together in a very natural, fluid manner. Like I said - I am very much intuitively driven when it comes to art, which is why the abstract arts appeal to me so enormously.
One of the “art lessons” my mom taught me, which I have come to know well in my own career too… the secret to visual depth and ultimately a great piece of art is… “layers, layers, layers” and over the years, I have come to appreciate just how much truth lay behind that statement. Whenever I create a piece of art, even digitally… sometimes at the beginning Ican tend to get a little frustrated because it isn’t looking quite how I want it to at that point - and I have to remind myself to keep going, because “layers, layers, layers” lol… and at the end of the day I can pretty much always smile and say to myself - “told you so” haha!
This piece was no different. I took my time and allowed it to unfold at it’s own pace, never really knowing what was going to happen at the beginning of each time I worked on it, but as the weeks turned into months - so the layers began to speak for themselves.
Art is such an incredibly healing tool - and I mean that of any kind of art… be it painting, drawing, music, dance and even writing. Writing is actually something I started doing about seven or eight years ago for that exact reason - to begin a journey of healing. A little different to painting or drawing, writing allows you to release things in a slightly different manner - a slightly more conscious one where you actually express your thoughts one after another.
Painting on the other hand is a little more “free” if I could say it like that (in my opinion anyway). It allows you to become somewhat mindless and to lose yourself in the motions and strokes of the brush, which in turn puts you into a form of meditative state. I had forgotten how good that felt. Especially with traditional painting.
They say “there is a little bit of the artist in every one of their pieces” and that is so very true, although I have to say… there is a LOT of me in this painting, lol. Many years of all sorts of emotion, experience and circumstance which began to take shape in this rather unusual abstract portrait of a woman.
I suppose to some, she may just appear to be a chaotic mess, but to me she is anything but. I am a big lover of symbolism, so I never create a piece of art, or add components to that piece of art without there being some kind of meaning behind it. I think that is what builds the connection and “bond” if you will, between the painting and the painter.
Though, in the same breath - other than in the description of a piece… which for this one, is the quote I shared above… I try not to say too much. Art, like music, is an international language and I think that every person who looks at a piece of art, should be allowed to experience, enjoy and form their own perception and perspective… so that they can develop their own connection and resonance with the artwork.
So, here she is - in completion. The Reinvention. Not everybody's cup of tea, I realise… but her creation was a necessary step in my creative journey and without her, I don’t think I would have been able to continue painting. Now, I can.
She stood in her place for a month or two after completion - and then it was time to pack her away - so I wrapped her up in a linen sheet and then once again wrapped her up in plastic. Perhaps she will stay with me forever, or perhaps one day she will find a new home with somebody who connects with her visual symbolism on their own level. Either way, I am happy she came to be.
❤❤❤
Until next time...
Much Love from Country Bumpkinland, South Africa xxx
Jaynielea
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Hi @jaynie, great news! Your content was selected by curators @nalexadre, @ten-years-before to receive a special curation from BeBlurt 🎉 Don't hesitate to upvote this comment as the curators will receive 80% of the rewards for their involvement.
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Thank Youuuuuuuuuuuuu 💜
Your work is beautiful and captivating, it fills my screen with beauty.😉🌷
That's an interesting observation.
For me, it's the opposite way around. (although my artistic talents, in respect to painting/drawing - are so well hidden I've yet to discover them! - although I can manage had hoc buildings/'chopstick soldiers', and terrain pieces, for wargaming purposes ! lol.
With your graphic design talents, does this mean we can collaborate on (ie - you do, lol) potential covers for my book(s)?
....And would you like your work to be on my website/write on the website ? (months away, don't get too excited just yet.lol).
It's not going to be anything 'amazing' in terms of tech - just a 'plain old website' full of quality material, for people to enjoy - with non AI arts being part of it.
At least your work will get eyes on it, (unlike here!)
If that's something you might enjoy doing with me at some point, cool.
If so, email me so we have contact if/when blurt goes down.
[email protected]
Art is most fun when drunk